Has something happened to you and, after months, maybe years have passed, do you keep thinking about the problem? Does it still hurt? Perhaps you’ve been through a breakup, lost a job, been criticized, or you don’t even know why you lack a healthy sense of self-confidence or self-esteem today.
If you are not feeling well emotionally: You are not alone with this problem. Many people feel the same way. And if you can’t process experiences properly, it sometimes seems as if this pain from back then will stay forever … Then, a comment from a friend, best friend or parents is enough and the old wound is open again. This can be B. show in outbursts of emotion, brooding over a situation or fears.
But you can learn to let go of painful experiences and to overcome them. In order to close old wounds, today I would like to introduce you to a powerful process of change with which you can relive an experience – strengthened and with all the resources that you would have needed back then.
This does not change anything in what happened, but it changes what you have learned from it and how you deal with it. And that is important so that you can shape your future fulfilled.
Simply use a sheet of paper or a notepad and a pen for the exercise. So you can write down the answers to my questions right away.
Take a pencil and draw a line that represents the course of your life … where is the present? Where was the event in the past that you would like to let go of, and when was a point before the event when everything was still okay? Please set three marks at these points in time.
Your picture could then look similar to this one:
1. “Everything is good in the present.”
First, make it clear to yourself where you are today, in the present. What you’ve already achieved.
If we are really honest, then in the present, when focusing on the here and now, we are actually well. Take a look around where you are right now and collect a few reference points to ensure that everything is fine.
- What things show that everything is okay? Is it the safe place to live? The fridge being filled with food etc.
- What do you see?
- Which things do surround you?
- What is positive in your life?
- With which people do you spend your time with?
- Where are you now?
2. When, before the event, was everything still well?
And then, think again of a time, just before the event took place – Everything was alright, wasn’t it? And then collect evidence of this again.
- How do you know that everything was well before the event?
3. Give yourself today what you would have needed back then.
And then take a look, from the distance, at the event from back then. That lies between now (everything is still well) and before (everything is well again). And then ask yourself:
- What would you have needed back then so that it wouldn’t have hurt you?
- If you had been in what state or emotion, the negative feeling didn’t even exist?
4. Take the resource into your heart.
This is your powerful resource, that you can give a symbol and/or a color. Then take it into your heart. And even make that feeling a little bigger …
5. Let go of your past.
Now, imagine that you are going through the event strengthened with this resource, very slowly … Take the resource with you and feel how you experience all this very differently and much better now … and keep going with it until you are back in 2021, today, arrived.
I hope you found this exercise useful. You can repeat it whenever something is bothering you. The key to healing old wounds is learning from them. And if you know what you had needed then and could have done differently, you can make other decisions in the future. If you like my blog post, then I would be happy if you share it with others whom it could also help.